Desperate 

How much do you want to know people?

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I’m waiting to know the stories between the wrinkles that you have on your right eyebrow.

I’m wondering continuously how did you manage to get a scar on the left part of your forehead?

I’m imagining in my mind whom do you resemble more, your mother or your father.

I’m thinking of how does your lover look even after all that description you gave me.

That’s it, I’m just desperate to know you all over.

You curb my curiosity and I seek more. 

I don’t know what’s up with me? The curiosity, the inquisitiveness, it’s a childhood thing.

Maybe I would have become a great detective, but maybe not, because I’m still unable to discover you.

I’m still waiting to share our souls under the silvery moon,

To talk about the endless possibilities of how our life could have turned out,

I’m still wishing you could have worn your heart on your sleeve, 

That way I wouldn’t have to conjecture hidden meanings and unravel unintended intentions. 

I’m wondering what keeps you up at night and the dreams you have, 

To know if you deserve a dream catcher. 

I’m obsessing over the saddened grimace. 

Did you have a bad day? What were you thinking? 

That’s it, I’m again getting desperate. 

I’m unable to draw lines between prying, compassion and claustrophobia. 

I might have crossed them many a times. 

I’m ready to forsake barriers of visibility, 

To show you the complete picture. 

But, I need to know you’ll do the same,

I’m still seeking your heart, 

To be the caretaker of your treasured trust, 

To be a shareholder of the memories you house, 

To live the experiences of your life, 

To read you as my favorite book. 

The vows of my trust have constantly been broken, 

And have left me caged with distrust. 

You’ve given me hope to open up, and

I’m wondering if I’m your hope! 

Fat legs, Slim stilettos! 

Dress up, dress up,

Party happening in town.
Hair wash, hair wash
Condition, blowdry.
Facial, facial,
Scrub away the dirt.
Foundation, foundation
Splash the compact.
Mascara, mascara
Makeup and bling.

Look at your cheeks,
Puffed up and chubby,
Perfect cheekbones adorned with fat,
Thinking you look cute, still knowingly
Unknown to the phrases
Of ‘walking pumpkin’ and ‘buffalo face’,
And they unknown,
About your hypothyroidism,
Would that make them judge you less?

Mirror, Mirror
Double chin on face,
Makeup, makeup
Get the perfect selfie angle.
Black, black
Makes you look thin,
Fit, fit,
Makes you look slim.
Leggings, leggings,
Shorts and skirts, too much cellulite.

Short height, high BMI,
People call you letter O
Your bff, tall, low BMI
What size? Size zero
You walk in together,
Until you hear the mean guy say,
Your friendship is like sticks and stones,
Perfectly ten on ten, dripping
LiWith the savory snigger on his face.
Unknown to your overeating linked to your depression.

Accessories, accessories
Distract the fat,
Handbag, handbag,
Be praise worthy,
Brush, brush
Set your hair
Click, click,
Capture moments.
Stilettos, stilettos,
Flash your shoes.

Seen the walking ball of fat?
Dysmorphic and grumpy,
Shops at the XL store,
A waist of the world.
Airily, you ignore the comments.
They’re ignorant too of
The multiple diets you did,
And of unfaithful gym subscriptions.

Party, Party,
Dance away the night.
Shots, shots,
Buzz and high,
Names, names,
Focus on the high.
Fat, fat,
Ignore the screams,
Bully, bully,
Fight back
Harass, harass,
Walk away and cry.
Pizza, pizza
Overeat and binge,
Pop pill, pop pill,
Cry. Sleep. Repeat. 

One Sided Friendships 

Introvert, introspective mind, 

Dearth of attention, did all he find, 

Craved love that was battered at home, 

To share stories on phone. 

Introvert sitting at the class corner. 

Hearts colder, face warmer, 

Viewing situations from every angle, 

Waiting to conjoin life’s triangle.

Days fly, months pass, 

Teased around, reduced to a farce. 

Kids come, kids go, 

Introvert at the corner, high on being low. 

New child enters school, 

Huffed breaths, rapid beats, inconsistent drools, 

Armour for the distress, 

Or someone else to make him feel stress? 

Armour it is, for lifetime it seems, 

Shared over notes and beyblade screams, 

Stories were shared on phone, but 

Armour changed school, was gone. 

Introvert child sitting in the corner, 

Summer gone, winter nearer. 

People came, friends became,

Went to a new school to stake claim. 

Loved each, refreshed and renew, 

Hoping to receive similar sinew. 

Always disappointed with the response, 

Stay strong, stay strong! 

Fast forward, the loop continued, 

High school, college, same gloom loomed. 

Risen expectations and butchered hearts, 

Vacant soul and a thousand darts. 

Present state, similar situation,

Little expectations, feelings diminution, 

Heart pricks, thickened walls, 

Apathy looms, soft falls. 

Introvert child is ambivert adult, 

Smile, confidence is his cult. 

Found his sinew and mirth, 

In few people, totally worth. 

Worthy of tears, worthy of smiles, 

Still distressed of inches not turned to miles, 

Suffered from unequal friendships, 

But guilty of one sided friendships? 

Hide and Seek

Come, let’s play hide and seek, 

An indolent game to decipher each other, 

To seek each other, 

In person and presence, 

To unveil the hidden conspiracies, 

To unravel the smile mysteries, 

To conjecture moods, 

To know their stance and swing, 

To sip on the darkest secrets, 

To relish the happiest memories, 

Let’s discover each other. 

Let’s seek the hidden us. 

Come, let’s play hide and seek, 

I want to know you, 

Inside out, because 

What’s the fun in superficiality? 

Judge books by covers?

I want to know you, 

But not in a desperate way,

But in a cooperatively comprehensive way.

Come, let’s play hide and seek, 

Let’s start off with small talks, 

Furtive, secretive, restricted. 

To paint portraits, with the 

Brushes of smiles, and strokes 

Of sadness and tears.

Add colours with the grey, to create, 

To ultimately gauge, the mesmerizing picture. 

Come, let’s play hide and seek, 

Let’s acknowledge the gestures, 

The twinkling, the glaring of eyes, 

The gleeful smile, the sarcastic smirk,

The blush on the face, the flaring of nostrils, 

Let’s record the seasonal mood changes, 

The proportionality of the countenance to 

The emotion at heart. 

Let’s learn the subtleties, 

Let’s see, seep and seek. 

Come, let’s play hide and seek, 

We’re good, understanding perfectly, 

Acknowledging minorities, but 

We’ve blended, mistakes easily discernible, 

Feelings colliding, 

Tolerance fading, 

Egos and emotions at large, 

Tones hushed, voices down, 

Talks, bleak and gloom. 

Still passing gestures, refraining from long talk. 

We were hidden, sought after 

And now lost. 

My Broken Watch 

I set out myself 

To mend time, 

To revert life back to 

A thing of the past. 

My watch is broken, 

The hour hand points aimlessly, 

To a remote past, 

Of a time that I’m unaware 

Of the specific activity

That I was indulged in then. 

Callously, I move my hand, 

The hour hand moves again, 

And I’m again in the past. 

I realise then the non-functionality of 

The date hand, 

Whose value was subject 

To random movements of my joints. 

Suddenly, in a balmy way, 

I feel extremely powerful, 

Yielding the power to control time, 

To mend time of my own accord, 

But would time allow such blasphemy? 

To allow it to be dominated, 

To consider its power being threatened 

By a person hailing from below mediocrity, 

Time wraiths suddenly appear, 

Converged to convey their master’s message, 

Soon their master appears, 

After opening a time portal, 

I had wished for a dialogue, 

But witnessing the presence of one who musters Earthly reins, I

Settled myself for the monologue, time’s colloquy. 

Ruling the Earth since its birth, 

Manning each person, 

Stipulating time for each head, 

I govern each life here. 

None escape my foreseeing eye, 

From kings to Graves, 

From paupers to ashes, 

From monuments to dusts, 

From life to death, 

I have seen it all, governing it all. 

On my look, with my changing nature, 

The world transformed, 

From tribes to civilization, 

From mystique to modern, 

From biodiversity to extinction, 

From forests to landscapes, 

From rains to droughts, 

From abundance to famine, 

From peace to wars. 

And as I look ahead, in the future 

The change is imminent, 

But, the future seems to reap the past, 

Humans have never learnt peace, 

They fight wars for peace, 

And then fight peace for wars. 

They ease my burden of stipulating time, 

By ending their own lives. 

Many have born, many have died 

Who questioned my authority, 

None are immortal, except I. 

They waged wars against me, 

With time turners and sands of time.

Not knowing I hold their key. 

You don’t realise!

Each of you, wish to revert back

To undo things you had done, 

To consider having done it differently, 

To not have said those words, 

To not have been there, 

To not have experienced it. 

But, ultimately it’s these things 

These experiences 

These desires and guilt that makes you unique. 

Saying all this, 

Time wraiths left me to live, 

Time was gone, 

But my watch was mended.  

Portrait

I make overtures towards you, 

Seemingly desperate, 

Desperate to know you. 

I want to paint your portrait, 

Using the brushes of my eyes, 

The strokes of your smile. 

And bring it to life, 

With your unfulfilled desires that 

You convey to your busted heart. 

The tiny bits of your tedious life 

That leaves you bellow,

The experiences that you mirror

In the gleam of your eyes.

So that when I have truly read you, 

I could call it a masterpiece.

Kaleidoscope 

With my head resting against my chest, 

You resting on the table, 

I bend myself over you, 

To get the glimpse of your far end,

Multiple patterns of 

Varying sizes and shapes, 

Of cliffs and plateaus, 

With steep precipices, 

The place where a depressed soul

Detached itself from life. 


Lifting you up, 

Paralleling you with the ground, 

I see a new pattern forming 

Of myriad shapes and sizes, 

It’s a beautiful valley, 

With greenery and livelihood abounding, 

A place where happiness 

Seemed so prevalent, 

Reaching the levels of contagiousness. 
Now, I lift you again 

Above my head, 

And with gravity aiding, 

The shapes fall towards me, 

Like huge rocks, from mountains infused with anger, 

Tempting themselves with the 

Contentment to overthrow the world, 

And rippling human lives, 

Creating an evil disaster 
I change your angle to forty five degrees, 

And with that swirling motion, 

Something again forms, 

Lost travellers, thirsty and parched, 

Frantic for water to extend their life, 

And magically, a waterfall and spring appears forth, 

Nature is a great superhero. 
I keep flipping you about, 

Rotating you at my whim, 

And every time, I see something new, 

A valley, a rale, a spring, a dale, an ocean, a cliff, a animal, a bird, 

And if there’s no novelty in the view, 

There’s something new about the perspective, 

Something soothing, something different. 

Life would have been so much easier

If we saw each others view, if we

Believed in kaleidoscopes.